So much is suddenly up in the air right now and it's got me a little overwhelmed.

Lauren and Leo want to go on an architecture/city planning sight-seeing adventure to Europe around the beginning of June. Flight tickets are relatively cheap for that time period if we buy them right now...

Problem is, I have to wait to hear back from the city of Palo Alto regarding my internship. I kinda need the money to pay for the trip. But if I get the paid internship, I doubt I'd be able to schedule a trip to Europe. But then what would the point of making money this summer be if I can't use it on traveling abroad? That was the whole point. Catch-22.

And I don't have a passport. It takes 6 weeks to get one. May 30th is about 6-weeks away, that's cutting it a little close to buy plane tickets and hope my passport is here by then. I could pay for the two week express service, but that sorta defeats the purpose of buying our cheap plane tickets right now!

And in other news, I'm trying to figure out what I want to minor in before my telebears appointment comes up. I've suddenly come to the realization that I have a pretty keen interest in Landscape Design and that maybe after all this City Planning mumbo-jumbo, I might end up in a career in that profession instead. What I know for sure is, I want to be involved in a design profession.

The thought of being a City Planner just depresses me more and more. I blame Berkeley for this. It's given me a taste of what it's like to be on the other side of the counter, the designer not the reviewer. I do not want to be a beaurocrat in a planning office who's main job is to write zoning codes. I've done really well in all my past design studios and I want to have a chance to push it some more and see if I really have what it takes to be either an Urban Designer of Landscape Designer, or better yet, both via a dual degree. And the Landscape Design minor will not only give me a good background to go to grad school for Landscape Architecture, but also for Urban Design.

I never really wanted to be an Architect, I have a touch time visualizing buildings in my head. But I can spend hours visualizing landscapes. I was designing zoos and parks and my backyard's garden when I was 10. Suddenly me, Mister "I've known what I want to since 8th grade" is not so sure what he wants to do anymore.

The other minor which would be MUCH easier to finish is "History of the Built Environment." It is more in-line with my historic preservation ideals. But increasingly, I find myself losing interest in that overall field and finding that my passion for it is mainly rested in my passion for Mountain View's history. It doesn't seem wise to go to grad school and pursue a career in such a limited field.

So I was up late last night trying to figure out a schedule for either minor. Running into schedule conflict after schedule conflict and wishing that I had figured this all out years ago. I probably would have if I wasn't so busy trying to switch from Architecture to Urban Studies. Argh.